The Emmerance's Podcast

Singleness Series (2): Discovering Your Core in the Silence of Solitude

• Emmerance Victoria Odia Ndala • Season 3 • Episode 72

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Welcome to The Emmerance's Podcast, where host Emmerance Victoria Odia Ndala invites you to embark on a journey of self-discovery and empowerment. In this episode, Emmerance delves into the significance of singleness, sharing personal insights and practical tips for embracing this transformative period of life.

As Emmerance reflects on her own journey of growth during her years of singleness, she highlights the importance of self-reflection and introspection. Through candid discussions and engaging anecdotes, she emphasizes the value of taking the time to understand oneself, separate from societal expectations and external influences.

Drawing from her experiences, Emmerance introduces listeners to valuable tools for self-discovery, including personality tests and the five love languages quiz. By exploring these resources, she encourages individuals to gain deeper insights into their personalities, preferences, and emotional needs, fostering a greater sense of self-awareness and fulfillment.

Throughout the episode, Emmerance's authentic voice resonates, offering listeners a space for reflection, learning, and personal growth. Whether you're navigating the complexities of singleness or simply seeking to deepen your understanding of yourself, The Emmerance's Podcast provides valuable insights and inspiration for embracing self-discovery and choosing self-love.

Join Emmerance on this empowering journey of self-discovery and remember, self-first isn't selfish. Tune in to The Emmerance's Podcast and embark on a path to embracing your truest self.

Tools mentioned:
 Personality test: http://16personalities.com
Love Language Quiz: https://5lovelanguages.com/start/
Strengths test: https://high5test.com/

Freebie promotion: Grab the free Ebook The Beauty of Self-Love: How to Find Love In Your Singleness. http://emmerance.com/free-ebook

Get notified: The Emmerance's Podcast Newsletter!

About Emmerance:

Emmerance Victoria Odia Ndala is a Self-Empowerment Coach, personal development blogger and Transformational speaker. She has been helping people with their self-love and personal development journey by being their coach or accountability partner.

If you have any questions, contact Emmerance @TheEmmerance or email Victoria@Emmerance.com.

Instagram: @TheEmmerance

Website: Emmerance.com

Music Credits: @sakionthebeat

Speaker 1:

You should still be willing to take many, many information as you can and self-evaluating, like just taking the time to think and realizing that you are not your thoughts and you are not your emotions, you are not all these things that are taking you away from reality.

Speaker 1:

You are present. This is the Emirates podcast, where we empower you to choose yourself, because there's no other human being that's more important in this world than you. This might sound selfish, but it's not. If you believe that choosing yourself is selfish, then I want you to know that self first isn't selfish, and I will tell you why. Hi guys, welcome back to another episode of the Emerance Podcast. I'm your host, emerance Victoria Odendala, and today I am grateful for another episode. If you are new to this podcast like, follow, subscribe, do your thing, but if you are starting with this one, go with this first one, because I'm sharing everything that I recorded.

Speaker 1:

There's a singleness series that I recorded in my phone way before I started the podcast and I think it was while I was still active with my blog at emiratescom, so I will let you listen to it, as we're listening to it together, actually, and then I'll get back to you right after this recording to explain if I am still in the same mindset. So enjoy Part two. Singleness matters. Let me tell y'all how I was able to actually, you know, grow and within these two years of being single, I'm going to my third year and I'm very, very excited about it. But, yeah, I'm here today to share with you what made me figure out what was my value, what I really care about, who I want to be, who I am. I did many, many little things here, got scammed a few times, but I'm not gonna lie, um, I'm really enjoying the, the journey, my singleness journey. It's amazing how, you know, you can learn a lot from yourself, um, so, you know, just by reading a few books and being curious, praying, I was able to figure out, like, um, what exactly is that I'm here on earth for? What am I made of? Like, who am I supposed to be in life and all that you know I've been, I've been thinking about many, many stuff, and when I, what I realized is that everything that I've been doing up until now, like talking to y'all, this is part of my growth. Um, and just sharing the uh, sharing the times that the bad times and the good times that made me grow. I'm very confident in saying that. You know, being single matters. It matters. You should take your time and enjoy this. Now, this is things that I would like to share. There's actually three things that I'm really excited to share with you guys.

Speaker 1:

If you guys are looking to know, like, what am I here for? You know there's many books that you can read and I can tell you that you know you can read about a few Eckhart Tolle books. You can read a lot of spirituality books kind of helps you determine exactly. You know who you are, even though that, um, that question is pretty vague and you will have a hard time actually understanding it. If, um, if that happens to you, you should still be willing to take um many, many information as you can and self-evaluating, like just taking the time to think and realizing that you are not your thoughts and you are not your emotions. You are not all these things, um, that are taking you away from reality. You were present, you know when you're present and you actually, um, go back to the days, like where you were and who you are today and how that impacted your life, what actually hurts you the most, what actually makes you mad, and all that it's pretty important to just go through it. Take a few minutes of your day, of your time of your day, whatever. Take like 30 minutes and just listen to yourself, talk, listen to yourself, think it's important.

Speaker 1:

Another thing that you could be doing, um, I there's the personality test on google. If you just write personality test, I'll also leave a link. You can take the test. I suggest that you do it like first thing in the morning when you wake up, because it's going to show you who you are, what type of personality, what is the type that you like, what is the type like? They have different types and you can read the description. It kind of gives you a sense of okay, this is accurate. If it's not, then it's fine, you can do it again. But, um me, so far I had two different personality, taps types and I'm an introvert. Um, so it's going to like just describe who you are ish and it's it's going to just describe who you are-ish. And it's good to read about those things, because now you discover yourself, maybe it's something that you like, but you've never tried. It's probably going to make you go to that route and explore more.

Speaker 1:

The next thing that I'm going to suggest is the five love languages, to do the quiz for single people. There's also the quiz for couples and for teenagers and stuff like that. Um, the reason why I'm suggesting to take that quiz is because you get to know yourself as in, what is your love language and when you, when you figure that out, you will realize that when never you're going to be in a relationship, or even if you're in a relationship right now, um, you will realize that the way that you're treating your partner is actually the way that you want to be loved. You know, I tell myself that everyone is selfish, like we're all selfish at one point and everything that we do is because it's going to have an impact on our life. We're not going to do something if we don't have a win, you know. So when you do that, when you do the five love language, you will actually realize, you know, okay, this is actually what I like, this is my love language. All the five types are good because you know you might end up with someone that has the last type on your list, but you have to get to know them better and you know you will know how to love them better, how to to love them better.

Speaker 1:

Now, the last thing I would suggest I always suggest to take a moment to always um, to always learn new things, to to um have fun. You know, when you're single is fun. It's not like I'm talking about like just go out there and be a freak. I'm just talking about you know, have fun, like when you're working, when you're going home, like, even if you're single, even if you don't have a bae that's texting you like good morning, good night, be happy with yourself. Like say good morning to yourself. You know, practice that love. Like looking at yourself in the mirror. You can try affirmations, you can try meditation, you can try going to the gym, do a lot of things that just free your mind of negativity. You know it's always like staying positive is always good um. So I really suggest that you you take the time to get to know yourself and those are the tips that I noted. So, if we go back, what I said was take the time to take a few moments in your day to listen to yourself.

Speaker 1:

Self-evaluation is very important. The second one was personality test. When you start reading those, you will get to know yourself better and it's actually going to drive you in a few ways and it's interesting, it's a fun thing to do. And there's also the love languages. That will make me realize that you're probably someone that likes gifts and not just staying home and enjoy a quality time, which is normal. It's a beautiful thing. And then the last thing is just to have fun.

Speaker 1:

During that stage of being single and doing a lot of things, um, a lot of personal development activities. As you can hear, I sound tired, but yeah, I still stand on all the tools that I gave you. There are the five love language, the personality types, the personality test you can just Google personality and it's like 16 personality one, six personality test. And there's also the it's like five, like something about five. Um, completely forgot, but you know what I'm going to put it in the description of this um podcast episode. But, yes, I stand on business. I stand on everything that I said. Oh, my goodness.

Speaker 1:

Yes, I did a lot of readings and while I'm doing my social media detox, I found myself reading books again and rereading the Eckhart Tolle. Not totally well, I said. I think it's totally Eckhart Tolle, a new earth, and it's just beautiful. I love, love, love that book and I really recommend you to. You know. Read it if you can, and there's a few other books that you can read, and, honestly, one thing that I did not read back in the days was a boundary book. Please read any books that talks about boundaries, because if you are a people pleaser, if you are someone that put other people's first, that means you do not have boundaries and you need to fix that.

Speaker 1:

So nothing really to add on this, and I am so sorry everything you are listening to hasn't been edited and I'm sorry if it doesn't sound right in your ears. So if you're new to this podcast the Emirates podcast I welcome you and I am bringing more to the table. Like this is a lifestyle thing. You know. It's a lifetime journey for me. It's not something that I'm doing it quick and giving up or retiring early. I am taking my time and I'm just enjoying the fact that I am getting positive feedback from it, or even constructive feedback from it, and I really appreciate every single one of you who are taking the time to even listen to two minutes of this podcast episode. All right, so take care of yourself and remember self first isn't selfish. Bye.